Though, marriage is an exceptional union from the earliest days of earth existence between man and woman to be the main reason of family planning, in the same vein to be the pleasure in their lifetime. But, unfortunately, some find it difficult to meet the once they want to live with, and forcely they want to make it forgetting that they will be hardly given the love and care they are hungry for, and living in forced marriage is like living in the dungeon of slavery!
Forced marriage; is a marriage but unlike a legal marriage, it is a marriage which happens against the will of one party, against the intention of one among the couple and against his or her right to choose a partner. This especially happens to the girls, and it is the high challenge many of them face when they are matured or almost to get married.
Forced marriage, as it flows within our society, it has changed, been changing and will change the mood of thousand families if the brake of it happening is not rendered!, because it has been becoming the norm in our families due to so many reasons that they want to overcome; to maintain their relationship with others (due to their rich background), to get some of their desired luxuries from other party and many family intentions like fulfilling some weak promises.
Currently, there is a high rate of widows of both men and women in our communities. While, gazing at the problematic factors within us will undoubtedly unveil to you that most of them have been originated from that aforementioned marriage. This gives a lead to the terrible errors that hinder the fulfilment of the intentions of marriage, and that marriage leads to many futile feedback to those who are destined to it. What will pain one is that many affected from forced marriage are ladies having seeing how they suffer a lot before getting another partners, and others fall to deviant behavours after it happened to them; some run far away from their husbands’ houses to go for prostitution without a divorce warrant in their hands for they do not love who they are married for, some expose their lives to suicide for hating who they are married for, some refuse to respect who they are married for as their husbands, for they have who they wished to live with as couple. In the same vein, men face different challenges when they married who does not love them; right from insults, humiliations and many unrespectable characters up to where they will think of choosing to live alone. That is what leads to many divorces!
To cut the dream short, forced marriage is a marriage that deserves to be stopped, in order to reduce the rate of divorces, widows and to build the peaceful and long-life families. But, this ambition will not be achieved unless the parents start giving their children their right; to choose who they want to live with as couple, to choose where they want to live at and men to forget their intentions of marrying who they love instead of who loves them. Their is a need to implement an organization responsible for the overwatch of any parent who dreams to give his or her daughter to forced marriage by the government, to protect the right of girls. Even if the communities are sleeping should be awake about the forced marriage as an illegal marriage, an injustice to girls, and building an unpeaceful familes.
If there is no more forced marriage within the communities, there will be a peaceful marriage life to the couples, unity and patience between the couples will be a due to their lifetime.
In conclusion, my words are dearth to pass the salute to the parents who opportuned their children to choose the partners themselves, and my hope rely that all parents who have the dream or intention to tie forced marriage for their children should be conscious about the consequences and results it gives birth to. I hope any family to live in peace and unity, including forced-marriage once which is done unknowingly and forced-marriage to be stopped and forgotten within our habitats.
Biography:
Abubakar Muhammad Usman is a poet, essayist and a story writer from the great city of Gombe State. He is a member of Gombe Jewel Writers’ Association, a member of Creative Club Gombe State University, a current press secretary at Human Impact Global Initiative (HIGI), a special adviser at Funakaye Students Association (FUSA) GSU chapter, and a director Media and Publicly of Tijjaniyya Muslims Students Association of Nigeria (TIMSAN) GSU chapter. His write-ups have been published in Dailytrust newspaper, Blueprint, The Nation News Nigeria, Opinion Nigeria, Applied Worldwide Nigeria, World Voices Magazine, Williwash Press, Timsan Publishing Press Nigeria, Parrotbox and elsewhere.
